Things to know about Therapy

Before diving into the article, I have a question for all my readers here.

Is the brain a part of our own body?

Did we all say yes..?

Then what’s the need of creating so much stigma around it unlike the liver, kidneys, and the heart.

Why is any other organ or body part dysfunctionality normal but low mental immunity such a huge issue?

Let’s see, because society might call you crazy?

Well, I believe that no one person is completely sane in this world. We all have our own share of dysfunctionalities and being a little offbeat will keep you going in this twisted world.

But coming to the other side of being offbeat - the more serious levels of having low mental health immunity causing you emotional stress and pain that drives you crazy. 

Yes, I am talking about all those times when people take depression, anxiety, stress, emotional vulnerability, and distancing, a joke and treat it like just a ‘phase’. 

The foremost thing to understand and adapt here is that this is no fun and it is extremely harmful if not attended to with proper care. 

‘What mental health needs is more sunlight, more candor, and more unashamed conversations’

Family, friends, and all other loved ones do play a significant role in helping someone going through issues in their lives however only to a certain extent after which it is always better and recommended to seek help from a professional.

Keep in mind that these professionals, be it counselors, psychologists, psychiatrists and all other fields of doctors are not just individuals one talks to in order to feel better. They have a credible degree in the said field and this course is there in the education system for a reason. 

Home remedies are always there however one goes to the doctor for a reason because he is the right person to guide you through and treat you out of your sickness. Similarly, therapists are the right people to go to in case of situations where you feel you are losing your abilities to think straight. 

WHO IS A THERAPIST?

A therapist is any person who can give advice regarding ways to develop and enhance mental and emotional skills so as to lead a better life without being worried all the time. 

Now, many of us still think that the work of a therapist is to listen to what his clients tell him and magically at the end of the talk they are entirely different beings which is why we all tend to become the change-makers by lending a pair of ears to anyone and everyone in trouble.

But is that really the case?

No one comes or likes to come forward when going through an emotional dilemma and thus by just being there and calling them out is not much of a help. 

WHY DO YOU NEED A THERAPIST?

Like I have mentioned before, a professional is the right way to go about anything and specifically with matters as sensitive as the mind. Dealing with emotional stress and vulnerabilities can make you feel exposed and thus you may seek comfort in someone you already know. However, what is more, important to look here is that this can harm you as well as the person you feel so attached to because they will now be aware of your hardships and may not be able to handle them quite well. 

Another aspect of this is that later on when you go deep into this situation you will need certain firm decisions to be made for you for your own betterment and family members might not be the best option since they won’t be able to see you in any kind of discomfort. 

A therapist acts as a confidant while being close enough yet being distant so that you are well aware of the boundary line. He would not be easily influenced and thus will be in the right state of mind to show you the right path and help you in the safest way possible.

WHEN TO GO TO A THERAPIST? 

We often don’t understand when we hit or are about to hit the rock bottom but it is advisable to accept the need of seeking therapy when you can clearly see things going out of hand. 

• Inability to concentrate or focus 

• Difficulty in sleeping or staying relaxed

• Your behavior seems erratic and you are in one way or the other hurting the people around you (physically or emotionally)

• There has been a change in your routine and other life patterns

• You have been feeling anxious or just not yourself for a long time now

• You feel like not being a part of this society anymore

• You are stressed about coping up with minor or major issues that strike you 

• Decreased quality of life

HOW TO DECIDE ON A THERAPIST?

So many fish in the sea!

There are a number of professionals out there with a number of degrees and a  quality experience - each as good as the other however you need to settle down on the perfect match for you.

Think of this as a shopping spree.

You research, check the quality, and ask around before purchasing an item. At times it is a first-time bingo catch and other times it takes a number of days to narrow down on one. 

My point is there is no one particular procedure where steps need to be followed in the exact chronological order to select your therapist. 

But if pointers need to be laid down to check the credibility these are some facts you could dig into -

• Research - ask around or google 

• Look for experience - I don't say that a 5-year into the profession person will be less as efficient as a 10-year, however, if it does affect your decision, this is something to be considerate of.

• Check licensing and insurance

Never settle for something you feel isn’t right. If you feel like switching therapists after a few sessions, feel free to do that. Nothing is more important than your own comfort and healing. 

WHAT HAPPENS IN THERAPY?

The first and foremost thing is to understand that you will not go right into the treatment stage. A consultation and assessment where your troubles might be discussed and goals might be laid down on which you and your therapist will work together to make you feel calm and not be bothered again is what will be taken into first. 

The type of therapies and the course of treatment as to what your therapist feels will suit you best will be decided upon taking into consideration your comfort. This is where the terms and conditions stating both your duties and responsibilities are laid down - confidentiality, any legal actions that may be required in due course, the time of each session, number of sessions required, termination of a session, the involvement of third parties, everything is agreed upon in the first few sessions.

As you go further, incidents of your life will be touched upon to get an understanding of where you come from and make an analysis of why you are having difficulties in leading a stress-free routine. You will be required to talk about how you feel about certain things and/or people, how you manage or react in certain situations, your relationship with family and friends. Basically talking, journaling, video, art, dance, there are varied ways that you will be made aware of in order to open up. 

At any given point if you feel like you are not yet ready to address a particular aspect, feel free to put that across. Things will not be forced in therapy and you will get leverage as to what to talk about and when being well within boundaries. 

WHAT TO EXPECT BEFORE AND AFTER THE SESSIONS?

Remember that you are already emotionally exhausted and thus these sessions can make you feel tired and drained. Some sessions can be heavy on you while others may feel like you did nothing that day however every session has an agenda and does little by little to free you from baggage. 

You won’t feel sudden or huge changes in a matter of a few days and thus patience is what needs to be resorted to at the moment. As time passes by you will start to notice the change in your outlook and this is when you’ll know your therapy is working. 

It takes time to adjust and settle into a new relationship and thus there will be some gap before you actually start connecting with your therapist which is absolutely normal and thus don’t rush it. Let the connection be organic because if forced, the desired outcome may not be as expected. 

After the sessions, a sense of relief is what is expected and a certain amount of relaxation will definitely be felt. If this is something you are truly working on, each session will be seen as progress. 

HOW TO APPROACH PARENTS?

This is not always easy however you could try the following ways to get them on board -

• Make any relative or other family members to talk to them and get them familiar with the idea of therapies and the normality of the same

• Make them aware of influencers or movies and other documentaries that talk about the benefits of therapy 

• Stay firm on your opinion and stand up for yourself 

• Ask for permission for utmost 2-3 sessions with them being present (with the consent of the therapist) before making any final decisions

• If they don’t want you to go out somewhere, there's always an option of online sessions

• Sit and have a thorough conversation. They will be open enough to listen to you.

Going to therapy, seeking professional help, working on the issues, feeling better, all of this is secondary. The one thing of utmost importance is to know that you are facing challenges. Accept the fact that your life quality is getting affected and that you are going through a rough patch and then embrace this feeling. No amount of talking and treatment will work if you are not open to the same. 

In society, realizing this is not the only task. What is more difficult is to make your loved ones understand and make them come to terms with this idea. Even today the concept of therapies and counseling is looked down upon to a certain extent however if we ourselves fail to address it then expecting it from external factors is not right. There might be resistance but you need to be confident and convincing enough so as to stand up for yourself. 

Take the first step towards making this free from the claim of being a taboo and start with it from your own homes. Improving your lifestyle by taking care of other body parts and all other luxury or even basic comforts will all be a waste if the mind isn’t healthy. 

‘Give yourself the same care and attention that you give to others and watch yourself bloom’